The Technology Balance

Do you struggle with the technology balance?

I read something on facebook today, a poem about a "Mom" always on her iphone.  It resonated with me in many ways.  The mum was busy,even at the park, checking her phone.  She missed seeing her little girl twirling in her skirt.  She hardly acknowledged her little boy showing off his latest climbing achievement.

Today, after reading this poem, I realised I really am not present enough with my children.  

This mum could be me.  But not any more.  Enough.  In a strange coincidence, just yesterday I uninstalled facebook from my mobile.  It was completely sucking my time up with, basically complete *crap*.

 Our home has always had access to technology and therefore so have our children and I have always struggled and felt conflicted about what amount of time is an ok amount of time for them to spend with technology.  Part of me says they are exposed to too much of it.  The other side of me says but this is the world they are growing up in.  This IS their normal.  How do you strike a balance.  How much is enough?


Being a working Mum is a struggle at times, especially when you are trying to finish some of your required hours at home.  I know I am guilty of collecting the kids, giving them afternoon tea while I open my laptop.  This is not acceptable.  So I am going to make changes.  They will be hard, even though they should be easy.

When M2 asks me to sit next to her, or play with her, I will try my best to.

When M1 wants to tell me about his Bakugon (man, how I loathe these), I will try my best to listen and see his enjoyment from this.

All too soon their childhood will be gone.  I don't want to be left wondering what I was doing throughout it.

Affirmations

Do you use affirmations?  I have always been interested in these, even though the idea of them sounds a little, out there.  Louise L Hay who is a great believer and proponent in affirmations has written many books on the subject.

I have started to use three affirmations, each day as I am waking up.  I say them over and over in my head, gently trying to rouse myself from sleep. 

I am strong and capable
I am enough
My body will thrive with exercise

I repeat them, in my head until I can wake up enough to get out of bed and face the world (or more honestly, my ever enthusiastic children).  They (the affirmations) are not changing my world, yet. but they are giving me a mental focus.

I am strong and capable
Sometimes when I look around the mess that is my house with the ceiling that needs painting, windows that need washing, ironing and folding up etc etc, I feel completely overwhelmed and powerless.  The above affirmation is to remind myself that if I reflect, I am indeed extremely strong and extremely capable, of many, many things.


I am enough
I blame this on the "yummy/super mummy" culture we all live in.  I never feel like I get enough done, exercise enough, prepare good enough food.  But my kids think I am (mostly) awesome and my husband still loves me after 20 years.  So I must be doing something right?


My body will thrive with exercise
 I am really trying to get back into some kind of exercise routine, and this is going ok, but the focus to lose the weight gained over the last 12 months is disheartening.  I am hoping focusing on the positive image of my body "thriving" on exercise, will help me with my determination.

I say these affirmations through the day (always in my head - does that mean I think them instead??) when I am losing focus or just need a minute to "breathe". 

They are working... a little.

Learning.....

Today I am grateful for learning, in all it's forms.

I love seeing the enthusiasm in my children's eyes as they learn how to do something new.   Sometimes this is through me as a parent showing them, sometimes they are inspired by their teacher.  Whatever has sparked their eagerness is ok with me.  To see the desire and joy on their faces as they improve is just priceless.

I have also been doing a lot of learning about myself. We are often our harshest critic.  I have learnt that it is ok to try things, fall down and get back up again.  I love that I am slowly learning to understand that I have flaws.  I have learnt to accept that some of my flaws can be improved, fixed if you will.  Also, some of them are just what makes me, well, me.

Sometimes in life it is so easy to focus on the small details we forget the big picture.

Everyday when we get up and go through the motions that make up our daily life, we are doing ok. I think we sometimes forget the wonder that kids get from learning their multiplication tables or discovering they can read the word "the". 

The challenge of the daily grind, the hassle of homework, school lunches, working etc is tiring.  But try and allow a little wonder into your adult view point again, and enjoy learning from your children's point of view.  Be grateful you can be part of the experience.  Linking up with Village Voices and 52 weeks of grateful.

Round and round and round

Sometimes I feel like my life is just one big roundabout.  Never quite knowing how to navigate it, and hoping you take the right exit at the right time, without being wiped out, run over or beeped at!

Each time I make a promise to myself, whether it be about exercising, eating, drinking, the house, whatever, I stick to it for a couple of days and then the walls come crashing down.

Is it self sabotage??  This is a key question you are asked if you do the Michelle Bridges 12WBT.  Are you  your own worst enemy?   Do you ignore the small jobs because they "won't make enough difference"?  Do you go to the shops when you are feeling grumpy and it is almost "wine o'clock" just so you can buy a bottle when you are not really wanting or needing it?

I do and more.  Some days are great, I am totally on top of everything and am one of those "I don't know how she does it" women.  Other days I really don't even like my own company.  These are the days I then head to the gym or out for a walk and try and "get my head clear". 

Now, to my friends reading this.  I. AM. OK.  REALLY!  I am just suffering from what I term, "post crap year hormonal and emotional turmoil and realisation".   Quite a mouthful, huh?

You see it has all finally hit me, and I have finally agreed to let it sit with me for a while.  So sometimes I feel a little overwhelmed and sometimes I feel just great.  It's a tricky world.

How are you finding 2013???

Happy Valentines Day

Near You

'Neath velvet cloth of night and shadows,
my heart confessed its thoughts to the wind.
I could feel your smile from a distance
with the touch of your closeness profound.

The sun reached behind a fading sky,
so the moon could take its proper place.
Day to darkness, brightened by the stars,
leaving upon the blue waters
a shimmering portrait of your face.

You, with all your savoring sweetness,
tenderly pierced the walls of my soul
as you wove a new tapestry with
the golden threads of your hope and love.

Yesterday you offered me courage,
today you endowed me with your strength.
Every moment together, a gift.
Every day a celebration of life.

How lovely the music of your heart.
You are the air I breathe, sound I hear
and the spirit that gently moves me.
I don't wish for the moon, I have the stars.

- Orania Hamilton -

Signs

Do you believe in signs?  

Because, this week, I think I just may have been metaphorically slapped in the face by two of them.

Both on facebook.

One person, a celebrity.  

 One person who is an acquaintance.

Sometimes it happens like that.

It takes hitting the bottom to make you sit up and realise what you need to do next.

Two people who bear no relationship in my life have just stood up and "told" me to stop wandering around in the wilderness and step up.

Now I think about it, so did Mandy over here.  She doesn't know it.  But I do.

Every time I read her blog, something speaks to me.  I feel like we are kindred spirits.

I have been wanting to make changes in my life for a while now, but didn't have the strength to do so.  And that was not for lack of supporting people, great friends and the knowledge to do it.

I was great at making excuses and extending deadlines.

Finding more reasons.

But they have now stopped.

I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders.

2013 is going to a great year.

Slowing Down.....

We did not go away for a holiday this year (2012/2013 Christmas holidays). It seemed too hard to plan.  The uncertainty of where we would all be and what we would be doing was too great.

So instead we are enjoying a "staycation".  That is, we are staying home and enjoying doing day and half day trips.  Waking up in the morning, sussing out the weather and then just deciding on what to do.

So far we have:

• Visited Southbank
• Enjoyed a trip to the Science Centre
• Gone to the beach
• Tried Rock Climbing
• Walked/Scooted from Kangaroo Point to Southbank (and back again)
• Visited the local pool
• Watched the 9pm fireworks with both kids  - I know, how amazing, lol.

And as and added bonus, none of these places have cost us entry fees!  Of course they have included ice creams or coffees or both, but the kids are loving it.  The lack of rushing about to make sure we enjoy every second of being "on holidays".  The relaxed mornings are so much nicer.  We all wake and have breakfast - not necessarily all together, but when we need.  Eventually the beds get made and we change out of our pj's.  We have all be slowing down.  

Slowing down and enjoying that we have no "need" to "do" anything.  Slowing down for a time is so important.  No just for grown ups, but for the little people in our lives too. They also need time to recharge and just "be".  Down-time as such.

Sometimes in life we get so caught up in the rush and desire of what we think kids want, we forget what they really want is simple really.  

Our kids want us.

Our time - just for them.
Us to play with them - not tell them "in a minute".

Our undivided attention - just on them.

Us to stop and listen - to them, directly.  Not while we are sending a text or facebooking.

I try and remember this daily, but like anything it is hard to do.  

But it is so important to these little people.  

I am grateful that over the past three weeks (yes even including Christmas) we, as a family, have had time to relax, slow down and be together.  

To stop and read books, have backyard picnics. We have played board games, backyard cricket, fairy memory match and UNO.  Watched the cricket, probably watched way too much tv in general.  

But we are on holidays and like all good things, this time will be over soon, and the rush will set in. 

So for now, I am grateful for staycations, reading and the slow, lazy days of holidays.

Linking up with Maxabella over at Village Voices for 52 Weeks of Grateful.

2013.... what I have learnt already.....

So the new year is almost one week old.  So what of it.  I have not made resolutions, why bother with something that is only going to make you feel bad.

What I have decided upon is some words to base my life around.

Consistency.  Routine.  Happiness.

2012 was a tough year, but it taught me that I can handle things.  It taught me that my kids can handle things.  It taught me to live in the moment and enjoy things for just what they are.

It also taught me the importance of consistency.  I needed to be consistent for my children.  I needed the consistency in their life to continue when mine and my husbands life was in turmoil. 

I needed the consistency to provide them with the things they relied on.  Consistency.  I like this word.

In 2013 I want it to have a new meaning.  I want it to mean that I can be consistent in looking after me.  By exercising consistently.  By eating well consistently.  By doing the best I can, consistently.

And I also want routine.

Routine, in so far as my family knows what to expect. 

That my kids know that on Monday it is library day, or sports day .... you know what I mean.

Routine and consistency.  Together I hope they bring this family happiness.

Happiness brought about by the pure simpleness of life. The simpleness that is found in consistency and routine.

Happy 2013.