Sunday, 30 December 2012

A Heart Full of Love....

"A heart full of love... " that is what the song says in Les Miserable, and the song that keeps playing over and over (and over  and over) in my head.

And that, at the end of 2012 is what I have to be grateful for.

My heart, as battered as it may feel right now, is FULL of love.

Love for my husband.

Love for my beautiful, individual, different, eccentric, annoying and "can't live without you" friends.

Love for my beautiful, happy and healthy children.

Love for the end of the year.  2012 has been "bit of a year"..

My heart is full of love. And for that I am truly grateful. 

Thanks Maxabella... for your 52 Weeks of Grateful project.  I may not have been here every week, but I look forward to seeing you next year.

Sooz xxxx

Saturday, 22 December 2012

Time to Enjoy - Grateful for Rest

Finally, my working year is over.  Hip, hip hooray!  I need not open the dreaded "work laptop" until next year.

No more saying "sorry, Mummy has to work" .

A small respite from the early starts.

A break in which time I can relax.  Slow down and enjoy the holidays.

After what the world can only describe as a traumatic week, I think it is time for everyone (who can) to take a moment and find the "happy".

Here is some of my "happy" from this week so far....

This week I shared "bubbles" with my boss to celebrate a very busy year at work

My husband received the final "all clear" from the doctors.

Mr 9 had a friend over to play and then we went to the movies.

Miss 4 made and delivered Christmas cards to all her Kindy friends.

Miss  4 finished Kindy.

We looked after my BFF two beautiful girls so she could go Christmas shopping.  This made us all happy,

I have re-discovered Les Miserable, and still love it just as much.

And I could list more.

Lucky for me, I have the time to rest, relax and enjoy some happy. I hope you all do too.

Linking up with Kidspot for 52 Weeks of Grateful.

Friday, 14 December 2012

Grateful for Crying (yes crying!)

This week I am grateful for Crying.  Yes crying.  It can make you feel so many things.

Sometimes, as a woman the only response to something is to cry.  I feel like I have been crying for months. I am an emotional type person.  I am actually grateful for this, this crying epidemic that has been going on.

I have cried with happiness
I have cried with pride
I have cried with despair
I have cried with anger
I have cried with guilt
I have cried with tiredness
I have cried at what might have been
I have just cried

Crying is good for the soul.  It lets all that pent up emotion out and literally wash away, wash away down your face. Very therapeutic.

I cried while watching my beautiful Miss 4 graduate from Kindy earlier this week.  Complete in cap and gown.  Ridiculously cute.  She did this after starring in the Christmas play.  Her lines?  "There is no room at the Inn.  You will have to sleep in the stable.  Can you hear me Mummy??"  Beautiful, and tear inducing! "Why are you crying Mum" Mr 9 asks.  As I was unable to speak, hubby replies to him "because she is happy".  Try get that through your head at age 9. 

Mr 9 just nodded and looked at me strangely, then snuggled in to give me a cuddle.  He understood me.  He didn't understand why I was crying, but he understood that I needed some comfort.

I have the most wonderful and understanding husband in the world. Followed very closely by some wonderful girlfriends who understand me and let me cry.  And of course, my beautiful children.

Don't be afraid to cry.  It actually is very good for your soul.  Although, I hope I do a little less of it in 2013.

Linking up with 52 Weeks of Grateful.....


Tuesday, 11 December 2012

Riding the Rollercoaster

I've had bit of a week (year).  It has been a really emotional one for me.  Hubby went back to work full time.  M1 finished Grade 3.  M2 graduated from Kindy.  M2 has been sick.    M1 has struggled with headaches.  And I have felt all the emotions from joy to despair and everything in between.

I said in a previous post that I life is a roller coaster and that I was going to throw my hands up in the air and enjoy the ride.  Well, I tried..... and somehow this little family has come out ok.  Tired, but ok.


Sometimes life is like that. Everyone is tired. We all need the end of year break, and thankfully it is not long to wait now.  We are all ready to kick 2012 to the curb and be done with it.


December, this is when I start to reflect and plan ahead.  Think about what lessons I have learnt (that is a whole different post!), and during 2012 there have been plenty of them.

Already I am planning my routine for 2013.  I don't believe that a new year is a magic pill for a happier or easier life, but I do think it provides a focus point to start with.

My life will be very different next year.  Both my beautiful children will be at school full time (sob!) so I will have some more free time on my hands.  I have a feeling this will fill very quickly.  My working hours are already getting a bit trickier to manage.

It's time to bring more sunshine into our life.  To bring more spontaneous "happy moments".  These are the things the kids love.

So for now to feel a little melancholy is ok.  It's all part of the healing and regenerating process.  

I hope you are all ok out there.... thanks for listening to me during this year.

Back soon with what I have learnt during 2012.


Friday, 23 November 2012

Grateful for my children

Today I am grateful for my children.  That they are with me, close by.  
That I can cuddle and kiss them whenever I want to.  

That they are 4 and 9 and not 17.

That each night they are tucked up in their bed, safe, secure and exactly where they should be.

I am grateful that they still have innocence and wonder.  
That to them a good times is fun with friends in the back yard and staying up later than 7.30pm.

So today, I am grateful for my children. 
 That they are alive, happy, healthy, cheeky and here to drive me insane.

Linking up with 52 Weeks of Grateful.

Friday, 16 November 2012

My hands are tied....

I have a very good friend.

My BFF actaully and she is in dire straits.

And I don't know how to help her.

She has two beautiful girls - almost 4 and 18 months.  They are both just gorgeous, but like any kids at this age, tiring and exhausting and funny and demanding.  And all the rest.

She also has a husband suffering from post traumatic stress disorder.  He served our country in the middle east and is now paying the price.  The price for our freedom.

BUT... she is struggling.  I think she has PND.  She is dying inside and desperately trying to keep her head above water.  Hubby is no use to her at the moment.  He is on medication and having counselling, but progress is very slow.  Extremely slow.  Really, really, really slow!

They have just bought a house.  A renovator.  A renovator on a massive scale.  They have no wardrobes in any rooms.  No dining area that is clear to use.  No vanity top in the bathroom.  All this with two girls under 4 and a husband that thinks fixing speakers is more important than getting the house or kitchen tidied up.

She calls me on the edge  and we talk.  I offer what reassurance I can.  We have all struggled at times.  But she is dying inside.  Doesn't see a light at the end of the tunnel.

How can I help her??  My insides are screaming that she should get out.  But where would she go?  Who am I to say she should leave.  But she is dying inside.  She can not be the mum she wants to be at the moment.  She can't devote herself to her girls like she wants to becase, essentailly she is living in a war zone.

Please, tell me how I can help her....?

Challenge Time!

I just read a post by Mandy at A Little Space Like Home and it was like she had just read my mind.


Today I am starting on a journey for and with my kids.  I don't wish to say too much, but let's just say it involves all of us becoming the best versions of us.  

It will be hard at times, but lead to such a great place.
Wonderful memories and rememberings will be had and made.

The experience getting there, which will be led be me will be difficult at times.


But we are all ready for the challenge.
Here is to the next phase!

Wednesday, 14 November 2012

Awake to a world of possibility

Today I run the last official "event" for work for 2012.  After today all the stressful bits are over, at least for a couple of months.  After the event finishes tonight, I can officially breath a sigh of relief and think "wow! somehow I did all that!".

Excellent.

Because now I am becoming awake to a whole new world of possibilities.  There is change in the air for this house.  And I think all of it good.

Next year Miss 4 goes off to "Big School".  She is mostly excited about this.  Today she is doing a fashion parade at kindy to show off her uniform.  All the children get to do this.  It is an amazing place, the kindy she goes to, and the fashion parade is all part of getting them ready and excited about the  transition from kindy to school.  How awesome is that.

Next year also means I will have an empty nest.  Yes, both my "babies" will be at school.  That leaves me with TWO WHOLE DAYS at home. Just me.  What to do, what to do, what to do???

I know they will fill up quickly with housework, shopping, school involvement etc but I am grateful I have the opportunity to do this.  I love being involved in the lives of my children and seeing the pride and happiness it brings to their faces.  Just love it.

Next year we are also talking about putting an extension on the top of our house.  We started looking around to buy, but the truth is we both love our deck and back yard, and we are not sure we can replace this.  So the idea of an extension was born.  Again, another possibility.

So right now, I feel in a pretty good place.  My husband is healthy again and back at work part time.  Both my  children are happy at school/kindy.  I mostly like my job.

So, here is to the next phase, which seems full of possibilities.

Friday, 9 November 2012

Grateful for ... Being Needed

What a great thing... being needed. 

  How much do you love the hugs you get when your kids throw their arms around you when you collect them after a day at school?
When they say 'I want my mummy'  or just come up and say "I love you mum".  
Seeing their faces light up like that really does make those harder days worthwhile.

The unconditional love of a child.
It really means everything, doesn't it?


My Miss 4 is especially affectionate and demonstrative.  She is always telling me she needs me.  Always saying "I Love You Mama".  I wish I could bottle this stage of life she is at.  

Anything is possible in her mind.  She is counting down to Christmas AND Easter.  
All with that magic sparkle in her eye. She believe in fairies, and playing fairies is her favourite game.  She wants to be a Ballerina when she grows up. 


This year she "graduates" from kindy.  
At the ripe old age of 4.5 she gets to wear her first "cap and gown" and have an official graduation.  It almost makes me cry just thinking about it now.

 
My Mr 8 is also affectionate, although I am no longer allowed to give him a kiss if I am wearing lipstick.  Doesn't want the evidence left behind. My time is running out.

I love that he stills runs up to me at the end of a school day.
Feel lucky that if he hurts himself (not the hurting part, obviously), he still wants to snuggle up next to Mum.  Even if he is trying to be very brave.

At the moment he is obsessed with archery and sword fighting.  The the world of rangers and Robin Hood and the Three Musketeers. Oh to be 8 and have the biggest concern being where to find more feathers to tie onto the end of your arrow.



His world is changing, and in some ways he needs me more then ever now.  He is slowly entering the stage of life when he is no longer a little boy, but doesn't want to let it go.  He needs me.  My Miss 4 needs me, her world is changing too.  Off to "Big School" next year.  She is exited and brave and scared and reluctant at the same time.

So here is to being needed, and a reminder that, even though our kids act brave and tough and resilient they still need you.  Still need you to be there and listen, listen, listen.  Cuddle them, kiss them if they let you, and if you can, sneak in a lipstick kiss on their cheek.  


Thank you Miss 4 and Mr 8 for needing me, believe it or not, I need you both too.  More than you will ever know.



Friday, 2 November 2012

Happy Birthday to Me!

Yesterday was my birthday.... the big one, 40!  


And I loved every moment of it.

I was woken at 6.15am by Miss 4 coming into my bedroom saying "Happy Birthday Mama",  dressed in the party dress she had already chosen herself and, 
what we call her, "clompy" shoes.  Just beautiful.
 
 Joined soon after by Master 8 bounding into the bedroom, 
not to be left out of the celebrations.  Presents and cards exchanged.



What a great way to start a day!

The rest of my day was spent eating, talking, drinking (only a little bit) 
and receiving lots of lovely text messages.

Truly wonderful.  The best birthday ever.  I was surrounded by family. 
 Happy, healthy, loving family.



Made me realise that family truly is everything.  
How lucky I am to have mine all around me.  
I hope they stick around for the next 40 years.


Tuesday, 30 October 2012

Looking Forward - Time to Step Up

Finally, there is less drama in our little family!  I think now we can honestly all move forward.  Onwards and upwards.  2012 has been a tough year for us, and even though it is not yet over, I believe the worst is behind us.


But now it is time to re-focus and look ahead.  More than just the next couple of hours or days, which what life has been like for the past 8 months.

I think now that I (we) are finally through the worst of things, the adrenalin has worn off, and I am tired.  Really Tired.



I feel completely overwhelmed by the disarray my house has fallen into.  It is going to take time to clean it up and re-organise things.  I know once I do this, I will start to feel better.   So many things I want to do, just need to do them in small steps.  I know I can do it, but like anything, it will not all happen in one day.

It's time to re-focus on the family health as a whole.  We all need some fun times, times we can share and grow in together.  For me, I have started by walking again, with the aim of being able to run 10km by the end of the year.  Yes, 10Km!  M1 wants to come with me.  Soon I will invite him to come with me, but for now I need the time just for me.

Life is nothing without some goals - my goal is to get back to me.


So THANK YOU to everyone who has helped us through the year that has been.  Without you, I am not sure I would still be standing.  

Here is to the next chapter in our little life.

 

Friday, 28 September 2012

Now breathe ............

This month, our house has been a rocky and turbulent place to be.  We are all a bit tired.  And we are all finally learning to breathe again.  Small baby steps.  One day at a time.



The OPERATION is now over. He was kept sedated and on a ventilator for 30+ hours, due to post op complications.  Thank God he pulled through.  He is ok, and improving daily.  His heart is now "fixed" - mostly.  Still one more procedure to go.  It "broke" because it had so much love in it that it burst - well, not really, but that is what I told our 4 year old daughter.  How else do you explain it to a four year old? It was very stressful, for all of us.  I  have been be scared, and worried, stressed, tired, teary, happy and sad.  Sometimes all at once. 



But now we are all starting to improve.  There will be more "speed bumps" along the way.  I keep trying to remember what my mum says Be gentle with each other.  What wise words.

Thank you to all of you who have helped me through this time.  I have been overwhelmed at the amount of kindness showered on this family.  I could not have got through this without you and I will never be able to thank you enough.


Sunday, 2 September 2012

A letter to my husband


I have many things I want to tell you, to scream them to you at the top of my lungs. But I can't at the moment because talking about this before your operation doesn't seem right.  So there is a big grey elephant in the room.  It is stopping to torrent of emotions from spewing forth, because once that damn bursts, there is no way I can stop it.  Sol let me tell you this....

I want you to know that I love you.  The end, full stop, nothing more to say.  Except there is so much  more to say.  So I will say it here, in my clumsy writing.  

I knew the moment I met you that you were the one for me.  We both had other partners at the time, but that didn't matter.  I just knew.  Fate fulfilled it's destiny, and we have been together now for nearly 20 years.

You have brought peace to my chaos and provided the soundtrack to my grown up years.

Your are my sun and moon.  My sunrise and sunset.  I have never felt so safe and at peace as when I am being held in your arms.  Like you said to me recently, "you need me".  Never has that been more true.

I love hearing you play.  I can pick your sound out of any band.  I love too the passion you have for your music and the inspiration it provides so many others that you encounter.  Our son one day will go on to be a great musician, if for no other reason that he will want to be better than his dad.

You can calm me in a storm. You can see when I am on the brink, and say and do just the right thing to bring me back.

We have travelled the world together, made a family together and will continue to build our lives together.

I love you, and really that is all that matters.  The operation will be fine, I will be there for you every step of the way, to help you heal.

Hurry home baby, I miss you already.

Monday, 6 August 2012

Losing Gold or Winning Silver?

Have you been watching the Olympics?  I have seen limited amounts, and mostly what I have seen has been swimming.  And I have to say it has left a really bad taste in my mouth.  Not because Australia is not winning as many golds as expected, but because of the "disappointment" in losing gold and gaining silver. 

 The footage of Emily Seabohm was truly heartbreaking.  As a mother I had tears in my eyes watching her say she felt like she had let her mother and her family down.  YOU MADE IT TO THE OLYMPICS AND WON SILVER and frankly, any mum is proud of their child, no matter what their achievement.



For a commentator to ask directly after a race, when the adrenalin is still pumping, and the athletes have not even got their breath back, if they are "disappointed" or "devastated" with that result is just disgraceful.  Especially since Grant Hackett has been there before.

Thank goodness for Liesel Jones, who came out smiling, saying how great it was to just BE at the Olympics.

What sort of message are we sending our kids.  My son, M1 who loves sports, has even started saying "they only got silver".  No.  They did not ONLY get silver.  They won silver.  Stand up and cheer and say well done.

The rowing boys (apart from the drunken rampage thing) were a breath of fresh air.  Happy to be Silver medallists (and note to the London Olympic organising committee - where was the dais for the rowers to stand on???) and gracious at coming second.

Whilst I agree, winning surely must be the most rewarding experience, surely the fact you made it to the Olympics (partly due to my tax dollars, too I may add) should be good enough.

The commentary and  exasperation needs to stop.  This country, one that claims to be sports mad, is currently shooting itself in the foot.  What junior athlete (or parent of one) would wish to compete and train, only to be told you are not good enough.

Not good enough Australia.... Silver, and dare I say it, Bronze and just making it to the Olympics is enough.  Well done!


Sunday, 22 July 2012

Loving the Outdoors

I have had an (almost*) completely fabulous weekend.  Don't you love it when that happens?

Friday night was "Book Club", which included dinner with the girls.  Awesome food, great company and an interesting discussion of the book. Love Book Club and my "girls".



Saturday was fairly normal, you know the kids sports/activities.  Except this time M2 and I went along and watched M1 play in his soccer game.  He did great! He saved two goals in the first half and played really well on the field in the second half.  Very proud Mummy moments.  It was great to get out into the sunshine and enjoy the beautiful Brisbane winter weather.

That afternoon, we lit the little pot-belly heater on our back deck early in the afternoon (think about 5.00pm) and enjoyed sitting in front of it, eating dinner, toasting marshmallows and having family time.  Finished the day (after putting a very tired M2 to bed) watching The Princess Bride with hubby and M1.  Love these times. 


And at the risk of this being an incredibly boring piece of writing, Sunday was just as nice.  I played M1 at checkers, whilst basking in the sun on our deck, the kids played outside in the morning, while I watched them from the deck, and after a visit to see their cousins, we have all come home feeling like we have had a very "outdoorsy" weekend.

So yes, I am grateful for the outdoors. How for granted do we take it?  I look outside from my little piece of suburbia and my view is one of trees, grass and open spaces.  It is great!  Love it. Loving our little fire heater (and the memories this is helping to create) and loving that I am soaking up these times with my little fam.


Need to go now, time to light the fire again.

Linking up with Maxabella at 52 Weeks of Grateful.

* ps - it was not totally awesome because late Saturday night was struck down with vomiting.

Sunday, 15 July 2012

Looking Back

Time to look back over the week and be grateful.  

I am grateful I was able to spend a couple of days just with my husband 
(well during school hours anyway).



I ate my first ever burger from "Grill'd" - I think I am in love.  It will NOT be my last burger from there.


Did a spot of shopping (gotta love Trade Secret right?).



Was not required to do the school run 
(because hubby was on hols and he did it!).



Generally had a fairly lazy week.   Who shouldn't be grateful for that?


Linking up with Maxabella at 52 Weeks of Grateful.

Tuesday, 3 July 2012

50 Shades Over It!

Yes, I have been sucked in by the hype of 50 Shades of Grey.  The peer pressure got to me eventually, and I had to read it to see what all the fuss was about.  



And I hate to admit it, but it has sucked me in.  
I need to know what happens......

However.........

God I am sooooo over reading about these two having sex every two minutes.  Seriously.  Yes I get it.  They are "into" each other. But really???  Does anyone do "it" THAT often??  I was warned that it was "mummy porn" and that it is. 
 But I have resorted to skimming these bits to get to the story.  

The story of a damaged and tortured soul coming back to the light.  
Or so it is meant to be.  Poor Christian.

Would you let any man dictate to you, in a supposed adult, consensual, loving relationship what you can wear, who you can see and how many times a week you should work out.  Even if he was a billionaire? Seriously Ana, grow up!


Also, I like to read to escape (and yes, I know and can close the book and not open it again, but can you turn off a movie and not find out what happens?). More fool me.  Trouble is, this book invades your brain, and not in a jump into bed way, in a GET OUT OF MY HEAD way (yes SHOUTY capitals!).

So the question is with two books down, to I finish the story and see what happens?  Or do I put it to bed (no pun intended) and step away from this world I find slightly repulsive.

I haven't decided yet.  Will let you know.
What would you do?




Saturday, 30 June 2012

Just so Grateful

It's reunion time over at Kidspot for the 52 Weeks of Grateful..... thanks for the invite Maxabella!

I love this idea, the idea of every week you reflect back and choose something to be grateful about.  But like anything that involves long term committment, it is hard, and inevetibly, life gets in the way.  So no more excuses...  time to get back to being grateful.

This week, I truly have lots to be grateful for.  Friends, family, medicine, coffee, the sun FINALLY coming out (rain, always on school holidays???  What's with that???), just to name a few.

It has been a wild ride this week in our house. We have had M1 with a busy social life, a last minute cancelled handball tournament, work, rain and a very scary trip to the emergency deaprtment of our local hospital.

I have been scared, tired, sad and overwhelmed by the kindness of an (almost) stranger. And grateful.  Grateful that our trip to the hospital only involved a saline drip and a rest on the bed for a couple of hours.  Grateful for the mum of one of  the "handball tournament boys" taking all the boys to her house, so I could rush my husband to the hospital.  Grateful for the friends I have that kept checking in to make sure everything was ok and to see what they could do to help.



In amongst all this chaos, I was also grateful that my M1 understood about his long planned handball tournament being cancelled and needing to be re-scheduled.  I was grateful that M2 gave me a big hug when I collected her from kindy-care. I was grateful that I got to drive my husband back home again.   Grateful, grateful, grateful.



Life here really is a rollercoaster at the moment, but you know what?  I am going to throw my arms up in the air, smile and scream at the top of my lungs and try to enjoy the ride.



Tuesday, 26 June 2012

Catching the Spirit

Recently our little school held its annual fete.  
This happens just before the end of term two. 
The children anticipate and look forward to it all year.  
The parents wait for it with trepidation.



Term two is consumed with donating items (that we then buy back), baking, preparing, volunteering.  Generally getting ready.  The children learn the obligatory "fete dance" whch showcases the theme of the fete.   The parents come and watch.  They volunteer their time to run stalls, cook food. Anything. Anything to help our kids.


The community comes together in a way that is truly astounding.  The community raises an astounding amount of money, which is then poured back into the school.  It is a great event, and one that reflects back to me just how important it is to not judge anyone.

It is often said in many schools, "it is the same group of people/parents that do all the things" and until recently I had thought this true.  

Until I was delivering cakes up to the cake stall.

There was a mum in front of me - who I had never seen before.  
Maybe she works full-time, maybe she has kids in different grades to me.  
Whatever the reason doesn't matter. 

 What matters to me, is that she was there.  
Doing her bit, in the way she could. 

 She had already delivered a large batch of cakes and turned and said 
"I have 10 more cakes and at least 3 dozen cupcakes" 
smiled and walked away, to drive home, collect and then deliver again.
The point is, so many people judge a community by the active ones that they see.

Don't jude a community by what you see. Don't think ever, there is only a certain group or number of parents that are helping.  There are people, lots of people behind the scenes.
The quiet achievers.  
They are the ones who also helped us to "Catch the Spirit".

The fete was great.  The kids loved it.  The parents loved it.
And I can't wait until next year.


Wednesday, 13 June 2012

5 Times in 7 days

Five times in Seven days!  Yes, I know.  Amazing.  Baking that is. 
Yes I have baked five days out of seven last week. 
It seems that when the going gets intense - I bake.  


I also bake when I am trying to procrastinate - has been a habit since I was at uni.

The kids are LOVING it.  So is hubby, but he keeps saying I am going to make him fat.

I think I am trying to nurture my family in the way I know how.  

I am not very good at keeping a clean and organised house.

But I can cook and bake well.


The months ahead may be a bit rocky, but one thing I can assure you, there WILL be baking!

Sunday, 10 June 2012

Cold Weather brings Relaxation

Today I am grateful for the cold.  
The crisp cold that feels like it should be snowing.
The cold that makes you want to wear scarves and gloves.


The weather is unusually cold for a Brisbane winter today.  
It reminds me of living in London.

I love the cold weather.  Better clothes, better shoes, hot soup.  
Sleep-ins.
Snuggling up with the kids and hubby.
Watching movies.
The smell of baking somehow warming up the house.
I could go on and on.

Our whole day has been about relaxation, and that is thanks to the cold.  

So today I am grateful for cold. 




Friday, 8 June 2012

Hello there.....

Hello, and welcome back!  I have had bit of a "bloggy break" - writing was becoming a chore, and each time I started to write a post - I just couldn't.  Hmmmm.  So this will probably be a long and rambling post (you have been warned!), stream of consciousness type thing. But hopefully it will help put me back on the right track!



Lately life has been gearing up, as it does for all of us.  I still struggle that I can be so good at organising in my work life, and sooo bad at it at home ( I am working on trying to get systems in place, but it is two steps forward and one step back - after all I am really trying to be "present" with the monsters, especially M2 who heads to big school next year - sob! but that is another post).

Life has a way of throwing curve balls at you.  Sometimes they are designed to make you stop.  And rest.  And put things in perspective. Like breaking a toe.

I broke my toe a month ago - and it is still manky looking and sore.  Will be another couple of months before the nail comes off and it looks ok again.  I know, big problem hey!  I think the universe was telling me to stop - but stupidly I ignored it and kept working.





However, I took this week off work.  Felt like I needed a time-out from the roundabout that is life for so many of us.  Turns out it was a good thing.  Kind of got bowled over with some news on Tuesday, which while it was not unexpected in one sense, the timing was a real surprise.

So now I am looking forward, planning and getting my ducks in a row, so to speak.  So grateful I have some time just for me.  I should be cleaning the house, but this week that can wait.  I need to make sure my shoulders are a little bit wider for the rest of the year.  I will fill you in later.

Warned you this would be long and rambling.

Anyway, I am back.  Hopefully I can keep this going again.  I have a feeling I am going to need it. 

How has everyone else been????

Sunday, 6 May 2012

slow down mummy

slow down mummy, there is no need to rush,
slow down mummy, what is all the fuss?
slow down mummy, make yourself a cup tea.
slow down mummy, come spend some time with me.

slow down mummy, let’s pull boots on for a walk,
let’s kick at piles of leaves, and smile and laugh and talk.
slow down mummy, you look ever so tired,
come sit and snuggle under the duvet, and rest with me a while.

slow down mummy, those dirty dishes can wait,
slow down mummy, let’s have some fun - bake a cake!
slow down mummy, I know you work a lot,
but sometimes mummy, it’s nice when you just stop.

sit with us a minute,
and listen to our day,
spend a cherished moment,
because our childhood won’t stay!

-R. Knight 
 
(Thanks to Kellly from A Life Less Frantic for sharing this... I loved it and wanted to share it also).

Saturday, 5 May 2012

Innocent Eyes

I have been loving the innocence of children these last few weeks.  I have been seeing the world through the eyes of a four year old.

My Miss 4 is loving everything to do with fairies.  You may have seen that the fairies came to live in our garden a little while ago.  Ever since then, M2 has been busily discovering everything there is to know about fairies.



Did you know that fairies can't fly in the rain?
That different fairies leave different coloured pixie dust?
That each fairy has a different "talent"?

No?  Me Neither!  But now I do... and a certain amount of thanks needs to go to Tinkerbell (or Tink to her friends) for taking us on this journey.

Together with my M2 we have built a fairy house (an inside one inside an old shoe box, filled with dolls house furniture.  Cotton balls for pillows and a tissue for a blanket), 

The excitement the next morning when M2 discovered "pixie dust" throughout her fairy house  and  the food was gone was just priceless. 

M2 also has a "field journal" that she "writes" all her scientific discoveries in about fairies. This is an ongoing project that we are working on.  But the possibilities are endless.  Her imagination soars and her joy from looking and discovering is delightful.

It is Pure innocence.  I love it, and I never want it to go away.


Tuesday, 24 April 2012

Friend or Foe?

It seems the Internet can be an ugly place.  



These past weeks, one of my favourite websites and Facebook pages Lovely Living - Love the Life Your Living and Jen specifically has been the subject of cyber-bullying.  
How rude people seem to be getting.  

People seem to think that just because you are writing and not talking, you can say what you like.  Not true people.  If you would not say it in person, don't write it down.  And putting "in my opinion" or "just saying" after it doesn't make it OK either.

Same goes for Facebook.  I have always had a love/hate relationship with Facebook, and today, it seems very justifiable.  People de-friend you for reasons you don't know.  People that look you in the face and smile like everything is OK.  Do you know what?  It is not OK.  Why do people do this?

Facebook.  The world was a much simpler place without it.  Yet, I love it because, it allows me to keep in contact with people that are hard to keep in contact with.  Old school friends, friends who live overseas or in different states.  You can follow and share the adventures of some as they travel.

It saddens me that people can be so flip about things these days, and hide behind differences of opinion.  Friendships are complicated - but do they need to be?  No.



I am no longer wasting time on these things. I had enough of this sort of angst last year.  I have moved through it now and thought all was good again.  So enough of my energy has been wasted on this.   I know who my good and true friends are.  And if you are one of them, thank you for being in my life.

It's time to keep focusing on the good in life.  To only invite good energy in. I am a good and loyal friend.  Honestly, if you don't like me, you don't deserve me.

So here is to positive energy.  
Take all your bad energy, place it in a bottle and release it as butterflies into the world.  
That's what I am doing.